Hooked on a Feeling
by Yotama Shoro
Summary: Izzy needs to come to terms with a newly found emotion he is feeling for a certain friend. TaixIzzy/Taishirou pairing.


Disclaimer: I do not own anything Digimon related and this story is completely fan created. Please enjoy!

* * *

"I can't wait!" I said.

"I know, right?!" replied Tai excitedly.

Mimi, Sora, Tai, and I were sitting outside our favorite café, Tai across from myself and the girls at our sides. The newest, and last, installment of possibly the best comic superhero based movie was finally coming to theatres. We had bought our tickets weeks prior to ensure our attendance to the midnight showing, though it was painfully obvious Tai and I showed the most interest.

"Izzy is really excited about this movie," whispered Mimi, "I just don't get it! But he asked me to go and I didn't want to be rude," She stuck out her tongue playfully and made a funny face.

"Well, at least we get to go together!" laughed Sora.

We ignored the two and talked about what we thought would happen, given what we knew from the context of the last two movies and having read the comics together when we were younger. It was nice to have someone to talk to about this kind of stuff. Joe, though nerdy as he may _look_ , he has no particular interest with the comic universe. Matt is much too focused on his career in music to care, and T.K. and Kari were more enthused by the colorful characters in the zentai suits.

Since learning about the movie's release date, Tai and I had been spending more time together; talking about the movie, researching the actors, and trying to get lucky finding some leaked footage and lately it's made me feel… _different_. It seemed like every time I was near Tai, my heart palpitations were exceedingly accelerated, my palms would shake uncontrollably, and it felt like my stomach would explode from some sort of nervous reaction. I brushed it off as just excitement about the movie…but then again…

…I really should get Joe to examine me…

Tai was still chattering away about the movie, laughing and joking. I took a sip of my latte and glanced over at Mimi and Sora, who were also talking away about some unrelated topic, I'm sure. Neither Tai nor I were " _dating_ " the girls per se, we just generally enjoy the girls' company, much to Matt and Joe's dismay. I chuckled lightly at the thought which, in turn, made Tai pause midsentence, giving me a look.

"What?" He asked. "Was something funny?"

"Huh?" I chimed, snapping back to reality. "Oh, it was nothing. Just something I was thinking."

I set down my latte and upon doing so, my hand brushed Tai's ever so slightly. He didn't seem to mind or really notice but…a _spark_ …shot through my fingertips and up my arm. I shivered from the sensation.

"You okay?" asked Tai.

"I'm fine," I smiled, "Ready to go, Mimi?"

* * *

It was finally the night of the movie premiere. We were meeting at the theatre for 11:00 to get good seats. I checked the clock.

" _10:15._ " I sighed.

I had showered and gotten dressed hours ago and was about ready to leave when I heard my phone go off.

" _A text message?_ "

I snatched up my phone to see a message from Tai.

" _U psyched!?_ " it read.

I smiled and replied, " _U bet. About 2 leave. C U there._ "

It was odd. I had never smiled at receiving a text message from anyone as much as I had just then. I tucked my phone in my pocket, grabbed my jacket, and left to pick up Mimi.

We met up with Tai and Sora at the theatre and walked in together, picked up our pre-ordered tickets, and headed inside the auditorium. Sora sat on the end, Tai next to her, I next to Tai, and Mimi on the other side of me. I was glad to be next to Tai, we could share our comments about the movie and—

—something brushed my hand.

I looked down to see what it was and Tai grinned sheepishly and whispered, "Sorry," and shrugged his shoulders playfully. Thank goodness the lights had already dimmed in the theatre because I could feel my face turn the deepest shade of red.

During the course of the movie, I felt my body gravitate towards one side of my seat rather than the other. It was almost like my body was subconsciously telling me to reach out to the person; to reach out to _him_. The thought of it seemed unsettling and made me somewhat uncomfortable. I felt like I couldn't sit still in my chair, despite the fact that normally I can sit for hours during a seminar.

"Are you okay?" Mimi finally asked in a hushed tone.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I replied.

While again changing my posture, I caught a glimpse of something. Unsure of what I saw, I leaned over nonchalantly, trying not to get anyone's attention and then I saw it—

—and my heart sank.

Sora's hand rested on the arm of the chair and Tai's lay on top; just _laid_ there. It was a completely harmless action but it was enough to raise a reaction out of me. It felt like a hot coal was stuck in my throat, and I kept trying to gulp it down. Then my vision became blurry and my cheeks felt warm and wet.

"Izzy? Are you feeling okay?" Mimi asked, sincere concern in her voice.

"I-I'm fine." I somehow managed to reply. I quickly stood up, head down, and rushed passed Tai and Sora and out of the theatre, somehow navigating to the bathroom. I stumbled inside and stood in front of the sink and sobbed aloud. I became unable to stand and dropped to the ground, letting the tears flow down my cheeks and onto the backs of my hands which somehow supported my weight as I crumpled to the floor.

" _What is WRONG with me?!_ " I thought.

Everything I was feeling up until now seemed so irrational. The general "butterflies" feeling in my gut, the sweaty palms, the recent flushing in the face. I somehow managed to stand up enough to grasp the sink and splash my face with cool water. I just stood there, face dripping wet, looking at my reflection in the mirror when my eyes grew wide as I finally came to a striking realization…but I held it in.

After standing a moment, somewhat stunned, but now content with my newfound awareness, I dried my face with a couple of towels and leaned against the sink, crossing my arms and trying to rationalize my thoughts when I was interrupted.

"Izzy, you in here?" called a familiar voice.

"Yes, Tai." I said weakly.

"The movie's over, we're about to head out. You all right?" He replied.

"I'm fine. Just give me a moment."

Everyone was already waiting outside the bathroom for me, anxious looks inscribed on their faces. I choked back the few tears that were trying to worm their way out of my tear ducts and put on a noticeably fake smile. I offered Mimi my arm, which she took, and we walked out of the theatre, Tai and Sora following just a few steps behind. At this point, all I wanted was to go home and break down in front of my computer, get lost and try to figure everything out.

As Mimi and I walked to my car, every fiber of my being fought to keep focused on the sidewalk ahead of me, to not look back, to not look at _him_. But something forced me. I glanced behind cautiously, confident that I would see them walking the opposite direction, hand-in-hand but—

—eyes.

Tai's normally light brown eyes were now dimmed with worry and I felt them burrow into my own. He looked confused; like he had a problem he couldn't solve and didn't have the means of approaching it. He seemed to open his mouth to say something, but he hesitated and instead ushered Sora to the car with an arm around her shoulder. I wanted to stop him, to see what he wanted to say, but I just kept walking, too.

* * *

For the next few days, I had very little appetite. I was restless, I couldn't concentrate on anything. I felt like I had fallen off the face of the Earth and, at times, I deeply wished I could disappear. I just wanted to put my feelings in a box and bury them in an unfathomable, obscure pit rather than try to accept them as part of my being. But this was reality, and it wasn't like these emotions were going to rid themselves so easily.

Despite everything, my absence from the real world did leave my friends greatly concerned about my well-being, but one in particular knocked on my door. One whom I secretly wished would.

"Tai?"

"Hey, Izzy! I was just in the neighborhood and I, uh, wanted to see how you're doing."

Though it was quite obviously a lie, nonetheless, I was happy to have someone with me. Especially _him_.

"Are you busy? Can I come in?" He asked.

"Yeah, sure."

We walked into the kitchen and I offered him a seat. For some reason, I found myself sitting opposite from him on the far side of the table, eyes averted, as if I was feeling guilty to be in his presence.

"Um…so…" Tai started, sounding unsure of exactly what to say. "No one's seen you around lately. How are you doing?"

Still avoiding his eyes, I replied, "I'm…okay." But it was painfully apparent that wasn't the whole truth.

There was a tense moment of silence.

Then, as if my voice had been taken over by some unnatural force, I felt compelled to speak, "Tai, I-there's something I think I need to tell you…I-"

Feeling determined now, I looked up to where Tai was sitting only to find him not seated there. I furrowed my brow, about to get up out of my chair, when I felt something warm enshroud me. Tai was now behind me, his arms drooping over my shoulders, leaning his forehead on the back of mine, he sighed deeply.

"Izzy, listen a sec," he said in a tone so quiet I had to strain to hear, "When Sora and I left the other night, we decided a relationship between the two of us could never work," he chuckled half-heartedly. "I had always thought Sora and I would be _something_ , but last night I felt… _nothing_."

Tai was confiding in me about his newfound heartbreak over Sora…someone he'd always felt close to, had genuine love for, and all I could feel was… _relief_. The shame I felt just then was overwhelming. I closed my eyes and tried to squeeze the tears back, but a stubborn one trickled down my cheek.

Tai continued, "But it got me to thinking more about _you_." My eyes fluttered open. "Lately you and I have been spending more time together and, I admit, I like being with you…" He stopped, seemingly to compose himself. In a half-choked voice he continued, "And when you rushed out of your chair like you did that night," he paused again, "I felt like I had done something to hurt you and I felt so guilty and so helpless…" As he said that, Tai's body pushed forward, his torso now leaning on my back, in a somewhat backwards half-hug.

I felt so many sensations swelling up inside of me. Loathing, embarrassment, guilt…yet on the same note, I felt warmth, happiness, and _something_ else. The weight of it all was too much to bear. I clutched Tai's arms, wrapping them around me, as if to protect me from myself and more tears welled up in my eyes.

"So when we were leaving and you turned around," Tai began again, "I wanted so much to run up to you, to see if you were really okay, but I couldn't even manage that…what kind of person does that? What kind of friend—I'm so sorry, Izzy…I-"

Before I could let Tai finish his sentence, something compelled me to turn around. I wanted to let him know I was okay, that it wasn't his fault, but the words wouldn't come out. I turned around so quickly in my chair that we ended up on the floor, the chair crashing to the ground. I flung my arms around Tai and buried my head into his chest and sobbed.

"Tai, _I'm_ the one that's sorry!" I cried out, "These past few weeks I've been harboring feelings I don't understand. When I'm around you I feel so happy that I feel ill even…and when I saw you holding Sora's hand that night, I became so angry I…I-"

"Were you…jealous?" Tai asked slowly, as if asking himself the same question.

"I-," I choked. Jealous? Why would I feel jealous? That would mean I would have to have a genuine feeling of interest for…

"I suppose…it's plausible." I finally said, but with some reluctance. "But I don't underst—"

"Do you think maybe…you have feelings for me?" Tai interrupted. He said it with an air of uncertainty; it was as if he almost didn't believe it himself.

I looked up at him blankly. It was almost as if he had read my mind. I wasn't sure how to approach his question. "I-I…" I was so flabbergasted; no words could form in my mouth.

Tai gently took my head into his hands and stared into my eyes, "I…feel like I have to do something and you have to promise me," he swallowed dryly, "that you won't change how you feel about me…that you won't _hate_ me…"

The emphasis he put on that word made my stomach lurch. Hate him? _Never_.

I gulped hard, my lip quivered and I nodded my head slowly in agreement.

What happened next…left my head whirling. It was like time had slowed down in the room.

I could feel our bodies slowly drawing towards one another; it was like a weak magnetism, and finally, after what felt like eons, our lips _met_. My body jolted at the touch. I felt myself sink deeper into his arms, deeper into this _kiss_. His lips were so soft, warm against mine. I could barely tell where my lips ended and his began. It was like one of those rare dreams that you remember when you wake up and want to recollect every detail. We parted briefly and we rested our foreheads against each other, looking into the other's eyes, searching not for answers, but for some sort of confirmation.

When we realized what had happened, what we had just done, we separated almost instantaneously. We sat next to each other on the floor, leaning against the wall. I lifted my knees to my chest and hugged them somewhat protectively, hiding my head into my legs, while he sat body sprawled out ever so casually.

After a moment, Tai glanced over coolly and took notice to my alarming body language. He furrowed his brow and a worried and apologetic look overtook his face.

"Izzy, what's up?"

I didn't answer.

Tai scrambled to his knees. "Izzy?" He said again, slight desperation in his voice now.

He couldn't see, but I was happy. I was smiling, tears streaming down my face, and I looked up at him. "I finally have my answers." I said happily, "I finally know what the feeling was that I'd been ignoring for so long when it was right in front of me."

Tai knew exactly what emotion I was talking about. He plopped himself down next to me and put his arm around me, pulling me close.

After a long moment I finally said, "Tai…" and I paused trying to compose myself.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"I love you!" I said excitedly and so loudly that I covered my mouth and laughed, acting like a child who had just said a curse word.

Tai laughed heartily and motioned to get up, holding out his arm, he helped me up and pulled me in for a hug.

"I love you, too." He said, giving me a light squeeze.

And we didn't let go for a while.

* * *

Note from the author: This pairing is probably one of my favorites and I wanted to do something cute and lovey. I hope you enjoyed this story! Any feedback is appreciated.


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